On slicing onions at a silent retreat and other life updates

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The past week has been one incredible blur.

Last weekend was lovely and I cannot think of anything better to do after exams. J and I went to Hot Springs (outside of Asheville) to the Southern Dharma Center for three days. We spent the entirety of the weekend in silence, living in one beautiful and intentional community and participating in working meditations, seated meditations, and even a little yoga. I learned a lot through the experience and found the whole thing to be more rewarding than challenging in the end.

One funny moment of the weekend was during my kitchen working meditation for three hours. I was assigned various tasks, mostly chopping vegetables and fruit. And I quickly learned that in the past when I cut an onion, I make it clear to the world what I am doing. I found it all so frustrating, tears streaming down my face, eyes stinging in pain and not being able to share that with my fellow workers. In the process I managed so cut myself and found myself once again wanting to resort to words and wanting to share my pain with others. I didn’t and through the painful, now funny experience, I learned that communication extends far beyond my simple words.

After our retreat ended and our hike through the snow, J and I went to the hot springs and then drove home.

On the drive home, I turned my phone back on and learned that my favorite person in the world, Gran had had a stroke. She is and always will be my hero and it all came so suddenly. My week since I learned the news has seemed hazy, difficult, and confusing. She is in our thoughts and prayers constantly and I look forward to spending time with her someday soon. She’s a truly remarkable, fiesty and fun individual and not being with her in all this has been torture.

I’m back in Davidson, back home and in light of everything, I look forward to being with family and enjoying these next few weeks.

On losing control

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Losing control looks and feels something like this I think.

Today is just that day. That day of the week//month// or year that feels a little different, just a bit harder, a little more overwhelming than the ones close to it. . .

Good things to come, I know that full well,  but for now, I am set on making lists of my priorities. . . and doing. . .

On this day, I am thankful for these things:

+ Sleeping in a little later than intended

+ An avocado and coffee breakfast

+ Documentary films about bees, bbq, and big Southern eating from the Southern Foodways Alliance

+ A paying job [*too many jobs at the moment really. . .]

+ Papers and projects and the stuff I complain about now but will one day be glad I did. . .

“What are we going to do differently when we get up tomorrow?” – Gloria Steinem

[Photo: Delhi, India//Grace Farson]

Brand new week

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Here’s to a brand new week and all the:

+ Saturated Nepal dreams

+ Working hard hours [2 jobs + full time student = good life]

+ Staying up late

+ Studying food

+ 8 a.m. yoga

+ Memorizing scripts and acting a part

+ Finding flexibility

+ Meetings//interviews . . . meetings//interviews

+ Active moments

+ Dreaming bigger than I should

+ Teeth stained by too much coffee

+ Rediscovering the magic of twitter

+ Looking back at this photo for inspiration//motivation in dull moments

Happy last week of the first month of the new year! Make it count.

[Photos: Durbar Square. Kathmandu, Nepal//Grace Farson]

the start of a new week

it is going to be a great week, i can feel it. i am so ready for a break, for thanksgiving, and most of all for time with the ones i love most.

here’s to a good week. mine has started off well already. . .

starting with today – ecstatic dance at the flowjo with etta today in carborro, weaver street salad for lunch, and of course some open eye and journal writing time.

then tomorrow – dana comes to nc!!! i couldn’t be more excited. she’s such a happy part of my life!

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“the complexity of our present trouble suggests as never before that we need to change our present concept of education. education is not properly an industry, and its proper use is not to serve industries, either by job-training or by industry-subsidized research. it’s proper use is to enable citizens to live lives that are economically, politically, socially, and culturally responsible. this cannot be done by gathering or “accessing” what we now call “information” – which is to say facts without context and therefore without priority. a proper education enables young people to put their lives in order, which means knowing what things are more important than other things; it means putting first things first.”

– wendell berry

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happy sunday!

here’s a song for this brand new week.

{photo from the top of some mountain in beautiful queenstown, nz}